Still Amazed My Heart Knows When

So it is only October 2. But yet, I am already teary, and my heart physically aches. I actually took a xanax because I just couldn't breathe. I don't know how my subconscious keeps track of the months but somehow it does. I hurt so bad already. and I still have 27 days until the day that marks when Korry got her wings. It will be 4 years this year. And sitting here typing I am already starting to tear up again. Normally I am fine, I can discuss Korry with not too much problem. And smile when I think of her. But not today.  In some ways I am glad for days like today, when I just want to sit and cry. It helps remind me that I have lost a precious daughter, and my life has changed and will never be the same.
I pray for God's comfort and warm hugs to help me get thru this, and as always He will be there, for He is always there, it is me that wanders. He is truly my rock in the storm that is my life.