The things People Say

I have learned to brace myself to the emotions that hit when people say things unknowingly or unthinkingly about  death or their children. For the most part I do pretty good. But this morning as I was getting ready for work and put on a black tank dress (with red embroidery on the front) my husband looked at me and said "the lady in black, are you in mourning or something?"  I could not believe him. It was all I could do to keep from saying "yes, I am in mourning and will be for a long time".  It was just so out of the blue and unkind from my standpoint. I am sure, knowing my husband, he did not realize the implications of what he said. But wow it hurt. I don't share my feelings with him about Korry any more, because he would be worried about me, even tho he knows it is a long process, from his own experiences.  He quietly understands sometimes. Like the first time Jazsper stood at Korry's cross and sang songs to her, and then said by mom, love you. I totally lost it. It broke my heart on so many levels. So the next time we went, and Jazsper of course did the same thing, I got back in the car, and Paul had his handkerchief ready for me.  So I know he understands things. I just wish he could think better!