Grieving Mother.. the journey through Life after my Daughter died

I thought I was done posting.  That perhaps there was nothing more to say. What a silly thought. There will always be something to say about Korry. It has been 6 years now and I guess plus a couple weeks. We put balloons on her cross as we always do on the day she died. Today when I drove into town, there were new balloons and some flowers too.  In all the time since she has been gone, no one has ever put anything on her cross, besides me and my other daughter, Kelsey.  It touched my heart that someone had thought of her and did that. That she was remembered.   When I went onto her Facebook page there was a post from the guy who put the balloons and flowers there.  And a bunch of comments about people missing her and what an amazing person she was. And some had wondered about how much she would have accomplished if her dreams. Strange thing, I didn’t recognize any of the names.  I think most were people she worked with. So kind of them to be thinking of Kor...

I am probably going to end my blog with this post. Unless something major happens in the future, this will be the end of my story. Not the end of my Journey. My Journey will last for the rest of my life, because it will never end until the good Lord calls me home. Funny, Paul mentioned that it should take me 5 years to "get over this" as I have mentioned before. And as I have said before I hope that I never "get over" the death of my dear sweet Korry. But with that being said. Yes I miss her and think of her every day. But my life has joy, peace and love in it.(and it has been almost 5 1/2 years) I have hope in the love of God that Korry is in Heaven, and I will be able to see her again some day. I feel more that this is a "knowledge" then a "hope", but of course nothing in Heaven is fully known, other than we have a loving God and an advocate who speaks/represents us in Jesus Christ. Jazsper is growing up. He is 8 now. Milestones are still a l...

Its really hard to tell if my depression and irritability is linked to the death of Korry or not.  I have struggled with depression in the past.  I find a lack of interest in a lot of things, would I anyway at this point in my life? I know majority of my irritability is due to my husband. He is unable to accept that he is aging and because of this he is extremely depressed and more than just irritable, he is flat out miserable. Would he be as miserable if we weren’t raising Jazsper? I actually think Jazsper usually makes Paul better. But on the other hand we have very different parenting skills. We don’t fight over it, he just grumbles about everything.  Our life used to be so good together. If Korry hadn’t have gotten killed would we still be enjoying life as before?  Or would we still be going thru this period of grumpiness? I guess Paul picked up life for me so much after Korry first died, that now he feels he still has to do it, and it just bugs me. I don’t think...