Grieving Mother.. the journey through Life after my Daughter died

It's been an emotional week. Over the weekend, Jazsper wanted to see pictures of him and his momma. So, I pulled up all my digital pictures and we looked thru them.  I think that is where it started for me. And it just seems like all week there have been comments and questions for some reason.  I always miss Korry, but sometimes I truly find it hard to actually breathe, the grief is so overwhelming. Today all I wanted to do was just stop. Stop work; stop conversations; stop being social. But most of all stop functioning. I just wanted to curl up and do nothing. I wanted to curl up and try to make it thru the tsunami of tears, grief, and heartache.  I really feel that I need to let all this out. But I have no release. At home, I have my wonderfully sweet Jazsper to spend time with. And I didn't do a very good job tonight. I wasn't mean or short, I just wasn't all there. So often I just need to be held and allowed to cry. But I have no one to turn to. I wish it could be P...

It's been an emotional week. Over the weekend, Jazsper wanted to see pictures of him and his momma. So, I pulled up all my digital pictures and we looked thru them.  I think that is where it started for me. And it just seems like all week there have been comments and questions for some reason.  I always miss Korry, but sometimes I truly find it hard to actually breathe, the grief is so overwhelming. Today all I wanted to do was just stop. Stop work; stop conversations; stop being social. But most of all stop functioning. I just wanted to curl up and do nothing. I wanted to curl up and try to make it thru the tsunami of tears, grief, and heartache.  I really feel that I need to let all this out. But I have no release. At home, I have my wonderfully sweet Jazsper to spend time with. And I didn't do a very good job tonight. I wasn't mean or short, I just wasn't all there. So often I just need to be held and allowed to cry. But I have no one to turn to. I wish it could be P...

Jazsper started Kindergarten last week. August 3rd. Oh, it was difficult. I cried when my own kids went to kindergarten, so it didn't surprise me that I cried with Jazsper. The difference being, that this time I was crying because Korry should have been here for this. I hate that she missed taking him to his first day. The doctor I worked for was kind enough to give me a good hug with tears in his eyes as well. My friend in the lab just happened to call me, and heard in my voice that I was not doing well, and said a prayer for me over the phone. It was so powerful! She is truly an inspired voice. I am so grateful that she allows the Lord to work thru her to help others. What a wonderful blessing to have in my life. I had off the afternoon of August 3rd, so I could be sure to pick up Jazsper. When I took him in the morning he did good, but there was a bit of apprehension when I left. He had a great day, and was happy to see me pick him up. I was off the next day as well (it was als...